Being a romantic person, all my life I've daydreamed of my true love, my Prince Charming. Yes, it's a silly fantasy reserved for little girls reading fairy tales, but I guess I just didn't want to give up on the idea of meeting my perfect match. In this case, perfect doesn't mean being flawless. It means that the person is just the piece that's missing in the puzzle of your heart. After many attempts at love and relationships, one can become very cynical and even hopeless. Someone else can become very closed-hearted for fear of being hurt again. Yet another can still believe there is a chance, however slim, to find that soul mate, somehow, somewhere out there in that great, big world.
Internet dating... So many different opinions on the subject. I first tried it back when you had to use your landline to connect, and no one could use the house phone at the same time. It was not very common to date online and people were very skeptical about it. I drove far to meet him, but I was really hopeful that this would work. We ended up getting married about two years later. We were married for ten years and four months, separated for four years now. Our divorce was made official a week ago. We were not meant to be together and we both know that now. It was bittersweet. A friend of mine said that the marriage had a long illness and it died, so I was mourning that loss. I miss how much fun we had as friends, but now we can't even be that anymore.
Well, damn it, I still couldn't give up on real love. Something in me just had to try again. So there I went, I met someone online. Then I met him at a coffee shop about a month later. We had lunch. We talked for hours. We both were nervous and shy, but before parting ways, we kissed goodbye. And what a kiss! It was electrical, or like fireworks. I had never felt that before. I thought about that kiss constantly for the next two weeks as I anxiously waited for the chance to see him again. Our initial connection was intensely felt from the beginning and it becomes more so as time goes on. I know I am safe with him. I can talk about anything and everything and he really cares. Since I've met him, he has been a huge part of who I have become; he has made me better. He is my home and I am his. I can be the real me, faults and all, and he won't judge, reject or try to change me. We are highly empathetic with each other. He reflects my dreams, desires and deepest needs. He is the mirror to my soul.
"Million Pieces of Me" is a song that speaks about this wonderful treasure in my life. It's not perfect and flawless, but it is perfect for us.
Well, damn it, I still couldn't give up on real love. Something in me just had to try again. So there I went, I met someone online. Then I met him at a coffee shop about a month later. We had lunch. We talked for hours. We both were nervous and shy, but before parting ways, we kissed goodbye. And what a kiss! It was electrical, or like fireworks. I had never felt that before. I thought about that kiss constantly for the next two weeks as I anxiously waited for the chance to see him again. Our initial connection was intensely felt from the beginning and it becomes more so as time goes on. I know I am safe with him. I can talk about anything and everything and he really cares. Since I've met him, he has been a huge part of who I have become; he has made me better. He is my home and I am his. I can be the real me, faults and all, and he won't judge, reject or try to change me. We are highly empathetic with each other. He reflects my dreams, desires and deepest needs. He is the mirror to my soul.
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